Anxiety attack

Funny – as excited as I am about welcoming my family to Japan, as the day nears I found myself getting more anxious.

And it’s not so much about starting a new life with hubby and baby in a foreign land that got me worried most. It’s the fact that Mak’s visiting that got me most nervous.

In winter 1996, Mak visited me in Leeds. I was so excited about Mak coming, I brought new all-season sleeping bag, so that Mak could use my bed while I sleep in the sleeping bag. But Mak did not sleep at my house, instead opting to stay at a Bed & Breakfast not far from Leeds University. I was a bit puzzled at that time but shrugged it off, thinking that perhaps Mak preferred not to stay in my crammed room after being used to spacious hotels and all.

It turned out that apparently when she was in London, I’d said something over the phone which she misconstrued as me saying I did not want her to visit me. Which was ridiculous of course, because I had been looking forward to seeing her, had bought extra warm (thus extra pricey) sleeping bag to be used during her anticipated stay and had planned a visit around Leeds and to my Malay friends’ place. I can’t remember exactly what I said because I certainly don’t remember asking her not to visit – but that’s what she told Ayah, and I got reprimanded by Ayah. That got me puzzled then, and it still puzzled me until today because I certainly don’t remember uttering anything to persuade Mak against coming to visit me.

As she ages, I think Mak gets even more sensitive – to the point that I just don’t get it. When I went back during winter break, when I was back in Malaysia for only 20 days, Mak became merajuk with me because she claimed that I was only busy taking photos of my son, but not taking any photos of hers. Not long after that, Ayah reprimanded me, claiming that I didn’t care enough about my parents to ensure that there are some photos of them in my room – apart from my wedding photo and my baby’s photos. Well, I used to have Mak & Ayah’s photo in my own room when I was single – but that particular pewter frame, along with other cheaper ones had already been packed in one of the many boxes in that room, awaiting departure to my own house some day when I return to Malaysia for good, insya Allah. Yes, it went without saying that I was surprised by this new extra ‘sensitivity’. But the truth is – there were a few photos of Mak taken by my hubby among those hundreds taken of our son. Still, it was unacceptable because to Mak we were not caring enough to take proper picture of hers. Proper, as in, we ask her to smile for the camera, rather than taking candid snapshots here and there. And of course, any effort to make it up to her after she had mentioned her dissatisfaction with us was futile.

So, understandably, unsure about her latest unpredictable ‘sensitivity’, and this being the first time for Mak to visit my house since I’m married, I am extra nervous about her visit.

Any advice on how to overcome this nerve wrecking anxiety?

Do we become more serious as we age?

A chat with a fellow blogger who celebrated her birthday today reminded me of this one girl who used to pull pranks on unsuspecting victims on their birthdays.

There was that cola splashing from a shaken can on Liz (yes Nasir, I can almost see you smiling at the memory); there was half-a-bottle spattering of talcum powder on Nita after being rewarded with ice-cream cake on her 21st birthday. And then there were other occasions in which I became part of gang bangs pulling pranks on somebody on their birthdays, No other days seemed better to be doing these awful things than the sometimes suspicious victims’ birthdays. Lucky for me – those few years these gang bangs became popular, I had either celebrated my birthday on a busy exam week or quietly at home during college breaks.

Remembering how fun it was to celebrate other people’s birthdays back then with naughty tricks make current birthday celebrations seem almost blasé – cake, birthday song, some snacks. No outrageous pranks – it’s too cruel to purposely splash even a drop of colorless water on a birthday girl. Especially when we know that she doesn't have a change of clothes handy - unlike when we were in the hostel. And since talcum powder is mostly used at the surau – not exactly an appropriate venue to pull pranks, huh?

Juvenile as they may seem now, if I were to do it all over again, I would choose to get involved in pulling those pranks all over again. I enjoyed it, everyone else found it amusing, and I believe even the victim would smile at the thought of it although maybe with a little ‘geram’ feeling…

It was fun – unfortunately, what used to be practical jokes in our youth are often not quite practical in later years… Yes, I guess it might be true after all - we tend to be more serious as we age...

You know you are not improving on your cooking when...

...this is what you had for lunch on a Sunday.

I know it's a sorry meal. My landlord promised to help me out with the curtain rails this morning, but he was rather late, arriving at almost 11.00 when he promised to come at 10.30. By the time we were done with the curtain rails (yea, yea, I got curtains in my apartment now) it was almost 12.00 p.m.

Feeling hungry because I did not have any breakfast, I decided to resort to an old trick learned when I was in UK - simply boil everything. So, there - a 'western' lunch of boiled sausage, egg, carrot and potatoes. In a poor attempt to make it 'healthy' - there was no mayonnaise or salad dressing added.

By the by, hubby had made more missed calls than usual yesterday - hints to remind me that it's his birthday today. I haven't gotten him any birthday present as yet although I already made that compulsory call to wish him happiness on his special day at midnight. I'm thinking of treating him for a day out to Hakone or Tokyo Disneyland as a belated birthday gift. I know, I know - I might have to take my family there when they come here anyway - so why not kill 2 birds with one stone? Last year we sort of made a pact to go to some new place to celebrate either his or my birthday, and both of us had never been to either Hakone or Tokyo Disneyland (I've been to Euro Disney) - so I thought it seems like a valid birthday present after all... Ye dak?

What I bought today (and how small my kitchen is)

I went to Shin Okubo to buy some chicken and Thai rice. While I was there, grabbed some frankfurters and gizzards too. Brought a trolley bag along - I knew I wouldn't be able to manage carrying everything without such bag... Yes, I carried all these by myself (up and down train stations and all the way up to third floor where the apartment is located, with no elevator) Yes, I can't wait for hubby to come and take over such chore...

5 kg of Thai rice, 8 of 900gm whole chicken, 450 gm gizzards, 375 gm frankfurters... (Ja, kalo selalu macam ni, akak tak yah pi gym pun boleh kurus agaknya...)

Oh, in case I haven't mention this before - the chicken are imported from Brazil.

While I was at it, I took some photos of my small kitchen too - from both ends. First, from the entrance (yes, we are first greeted by the kitchen as we enter the house)

And then, from the other end (my bedroom's door)

Spring is here

What better way to tell the arrival of spring in Tokyo but for the ume (plum) blossoms? Here are some pics taken in front of Waseda university. Rather lame photos, but they are really nice in real life, and sweet smelling too...

Still, I can't deny that daffodils remain among my favourite signs of spring... There's not as much daffs here in Japan compared to UK - I actually stopped riding the bike on my way back from Urayasu a few days back to snap these shots

"...They flash upon that inward eye
Which is the bliss of solitude;
And then my heart with pleasure fills,
And dances with the daffodils."

- William Woodsworth, Daffodils

Please don't be stupid girl

On a lighter note, despite the language and the skin shown, I think that Stupid Girl video clip by Pink was kinda... err, cool. (Wonder what Zsarina, who once blogged about her disapproval of women magazines, would think of it though...)

On being thankful, part 2

As I listened to UNIC’s “Erti Syukur” earlier tonight, it reminded me once again to be thankful…

Lafazkan kalimah syukur
Lafazkan kalimah itu
Alhamdulillah...

Everything happens for a reason, so whatever comes, I must be redha - accepting without any feeling of remorse...

Segalanya yang ku kecapi
Adalah milikMu Ilahi(Tuhan Maha Pemurah)
Takkan terbalas walaupun sebesar zarah

I have a lot to be thankful for – a healthy son, a loving husband, supporting parents, caring extended relatives, good friends… I can see, listen, talk, read, sing, walk, run and skip. The last time I checked, I had been given a clean bill of health. I still have a stable job. I am currently doing what many are only dreaming of. Oh yes, I have a lot to be thankful for…

Kenikmatan yang bertandang
Terkadang tidak dihiraukan(Lepas dari pandangan)
Dan bila hilang barulah dikesalkan

But sometimes, embarassing as it may be, it takes small things, like missing a wallet, to heighten my awareness and realization of the bigger things to be thankful for.

Adakala aku hanyut
Adakalanya aku terlupa
Adakala aku leka
Ampunilah...

I guess, sometimes being alone at home could be a good thing, if only because it gives me ample time to ponder on lots of stuff I would normally take for granted. And since it’s holiday, it means I have a lot of time to recite the Quran and practise some zikr that had not been practised for quite some time

Kerana ku manusia
Lemah dan tidak berdaya di sisiMu
Seringkali terlupa nikmatMu
Datang tiada jemu

Bila terhimpit mulalah
Mencari dan menyebut namaMu
Barulah merasai makna sebenar erti syukur
Syukur atas rahmatMu

Funny how being under stress and a little duress could go a long way in reminding oneself to be more redha, because of faith in that “with every difficulty there is relief”. Oh yes, Surah Al-Insyirah has always been a favorite Surah of mine ever since I was asked to recite it during my Sekolah Agama’s Majlis Khatam Quran. More importantly, I had repeatedly found solace in the promise of relief for every difficulty, along with the belief that “Allah does not impose upon any soul a duty but to the extent of its ability” (Al Baqarah:286)

Rap: Adakala ku hanyut
Adakala ku lupa
Adakala ku leka dan adakala ku alpa
Kerana ku manusia
Lemah dan tak berdaya
Seringkali terlupa nikmat yang Kau kurnia
Ku bersyukur ya Tuhan
Segala pemberian
Walau luas lautan
Bukanlah perbandingan
Ku tingkat keimanan
Ku gilap ketaqwaan
Sebagai perlambangan
Terima kasih ku Tuhan

Onak duri kehidupan
Jatuh bangun sendirian
Ada hikmah yang tersimpan
Yang menguji iman

Of course I’d been a little hanyut, a little lupa, a little leka and a little alpa then and again. Nothing like a little anxiety, a little hardship that have to be experienced alone to remind me that I’m only a small minuscule creature in Allah’s world. Yet Allah have always shown mercy for all of His creatures, never imposing on us any burden beyond our strength, beyond our capability to handle.

Bersyukurlah selalu
Sentiasalah redha dan menerima
Tiap ujian tiba bukan diminta
Sebaliknya Allah Maha Mengetahui

Kan ku bertasbih selalu
Bertahmid berzikir padaMu
Sebagai tanda ku nilai
RahmatMu Tuhan

Besides, how could one claims to have faith when one is not being tested? Tests have always been part of the deal, so we just have to deal with it.

Aku bersyukur Ya Allah
Segala pemberianMu padaku
Seluas lautan pun bukanlah jadi ukurannya
Memang tiada bandingan

Segalanya yang ku kecapi
Adalah milikMu Ilahi(Tuhan Maha Permurah)
Bukan milikku pinjaman sementara
Syukur Alhamdulillah

And in the end, the truth is, everything that we enjoy are not ours for good. Everything comes from Allah and to Allah we will return. What we thought are ours to enjoy are actually only loans from Allah for us to enjoy while we are allowed to, yet He can revoke any of His loans at any time, without any warning.

Rap: Sesungguhnya solatku,
Amalku, hidupku, matiku
Kerna Allah yang satu
Kuserahkan segala harta jiwa dan raga
Sebagai tanda cinta
KepadaMu Yang Esa

I was told once that no normal human beings deserve to enter Jannah if it’s only due to our own good deeds. It’s only with Allah’s mercy that humans are allowed to enter His paradise. All He asks in return is our submission to him, the One and Only God. So, whatever else Muslims aim to be in life, first and foremost would always be to submit to Allah. For only in true submission, there lies in true meaning of thankfulness.

Oh well, just a note of self-reminder for my forgetful self...

Wallahualam.

Expressions

When Mak noticed I wrote “ashes to ashes, dust to dust” in an article published in the NST about a decade ago, I got a slight reproach for it.

“You don’t have to use such expression, Kak. Muslims have better expression for it – From Allah we come and to Allah we return. Why else do you think we say ‘Innalillahi wainna ilaihi rajiuun’ during any mishaps?”

Mak also taught me not to use certain phrases – like “fingers crossed”, “touch wood” and as such. Keeping fingers crossed for good luck in fact originated from some old practice of making the cross in the quickest way to ward off evil. Saying “touch wood” to avert bad luck has its origin in some pagan belief that certain trees would give protection if touched. Alternatively, it might originate from medieval times when relics, including pieces reputed to be from Jesus’ cross were hawked around, to be touched for blessings.

Mak, who admitted that she used to use these expressions when she was younger, wants her children to use Islamic phrases – because they are also do’a, not mere sayings.

So, we have been taught to say “Insya Allah” when we hope for things; “Nauzubillah” when we hope to ward off bad luck; “La hawla wala quwwata illa billah” when calamity struck or we are taken over by a situation beyond our control; “Alhamdulillah” when we feel blessed and thankful; “Astaghfirullah” to seek forgiveness from Allah when we realized we did something wrong; “Subhanallah” or “Masya Allah” when we see wondrous things and so on and so forth.

We say “Alhamdulillah” when we sneeze too, whereas someone else upon hearing this will reply “Yarham kallah” (for male) or “Yarhamkillah” (for female) – a simple do’a of “may Allah have mercy on you”. To which the sneezer replies “Yahdikumullah wa yuslih balakum”, a do’a for the listener “may Allah give you guidance and improve your condition”. (In extended version, the listener will reply "Dakhala jannah", a do'a for the sneezer to "enter the paradise" and the sneeezer replying back "Insya Allah", "Allah's willing"...) Certainly an improvement compared to just saying ‘bless you”, isn’t it?

Alhamdulillah, my brothers and I have Mak who has instilled usage of Islamic expressions in us when we were still young. Sometimes, when I chanced upon some possibly-Christian-in-origin expressions used by Muslim bloggers, I felt called upon to comment on it, yet I seldom do it. Maybe because I don’t want to sound like I’m preaching. Maybe because I’m not that pious and thus not quite ‘qualified’ to point this out to others. Some might say that they are just saying it without any reference to its Christian/pagan origins, and it is no big deal.

Still, at times I wonder – why should we continue using meaningless idioms and phrases when Islam has taught us better and more meaningful do’a to be uttered during numerous occasions?

Hien

We were supposed to meet at Shinjuku eki at 10.30 a.m. However, because I missed Otemachi station where I could change to another train, and then I belatedly realized that changing train at Kudanshita meant additional fare because the other train is being operated by another company, I had to retract my way back a few stations to Otemachi, and then changed to Marunouchi line. She called me when I was in Otemachi, letting me know that she has arrived. I told her I'm sorry for being late, but she told me not to worry, she would be waiting anyway. It was nearly 11.00 a.m. when I finally met her at Shinjuku eki, Keio west gate as we promised.

Hien looked fine, although I knew she just recovered from having some mild fever and cold. The climate is changing, and it’s common for some people to experience mild fever during this time. I didn’t realized how much I missed her until I saw her again. Since spring break began end of January, we have been in touch via e-mail and c-mail. I had been hoping to see her for a small party held at my hostel just before I moved, but she had to take care of her sick husband then.

She brought a small electrical heater, a friend of hers sold it to me for 600 yen. She also knew about my quest for hot carpet and some futon (for blankets - there are two types of futon, one used as mattress and the other as blanket), and she was eager to take me shopping at this one second-hand shop in Nishi Chofu, not far from where she’s currebtly residing.

As for the hot carpet, Fary had offered to sell me one (which she incidentally bought from that particular sempai who refused to negotiate with me earlier), so I had stopped worrying about it. The square carpet doesn’t sit well in her rectangular room, and Fary even agreed to receive a deferred payment for it. So, I only needed to look for blanket futons.

It’s not like I could not buy any futon in Gyotoku. Seiyu, the major depato, is selling both mattress and blanket futons for only about 3000 yen each. Still, since my resources are quite limited now, I could only afford buying a few used ones. I have tried looking at a few second-hand shops to no avail. I even rode a bicycle to one Anto second hand shop located far from Gyotoku city centre, but I only found almost-new blankets and a pillow that the shopkeeper wanted to sell at a reasonably high price.

I thought of buying just two blanket futons, but I ended up buying three – a good bargain at 1200 yen. The initial price was 1700 yen because two of them looked almost new, but the shopkeeper finally agreed to sell them at a reduced price because apparently she has a soft spot for people with small children. Besides, she didn’t have to deliver them to my place (she only does delivery in her surrounding areas and Chofu is a loooong way from Gyotoku).

Hien actually returned to her house to take a trolley back to the shop so that it would be easier for me to carry the futons and the heater. I squeezed the thinnest futon in my bag, and with the shopkeeper assistant’s help, we tied the other two futons tightly and tidily to the trolley. They were bulky, but alhamdulillah not too heavy. Still, I had to ignore a lot of stares from fellow passengers and strangers on the street as I made my way back to my house.

Hien – she is one of the most thoughtful friends I have met in Japan. I’m happy for her because her family will be joining her husband and her soon. Her parents and her two sons will be arriving in Narita a few days after my family arrives insya Allah. Her mother will only be staying for a short while, her father a little longer, but her 7 and 6 year old sons will be enrolling in a Japanese public primary school in April.

We had entertained thoughts of having a meal somewhere after school some day, to introduce our family to each other. Hubby has heard a lot about Hien and likewise her hubby has heard a lot about me too. Hien even claimed that she believe her sons, Miu and Sau, would be only too happy to play with Huzaifah because they prefer playing with baby boys than baby girls. Today, as we chatted on the train and complimented each other on looking bright and cheerful due to the impending family reunion, we reaffirmed our promise to have a family outing together some day.

On the way back from the second hand shop, Hien told me about child allowance provision in case I have no knowledge about it, but Sarina, Daud’s wife had already advised me about it earlier. As an incentive for more Japanese to have kids, Japan government provides monthly child allowance of 5000 yen each for the first two children, and 10,000 yen for subsequent children. A child allowance is available until the first March 31 following the child’s ninth birthday. Hien said I should consider having a second child while we are in Japan, perhaps some time next year. I teased her back, pointing out that if she gets another child in Japan, at least she’ll be getting 10,000 yen each month for her third child.

We kept teasing and laughing as we walked to the eki where I finally bid her farewell. The truth is, Hien knows that I need a lot of time to make up to Huzaifah for not spending most of his first sixth months with him. I on the other hand, am aware of the fact that Hien is afraid of giving birth because she had had C-section for both boys. But yes, both of us, at one point or another, had entertained some thoughts on the subject matter of each other’s tease. I guess, it takes a close friend to sometimes point out the benefits of certain things which you knew but afraid to admit yourself. Anyway, we are both thinking of not enrolling for any more intensive Nihongo class, preferring instead to attend a rather laid-back class, since we both will have to take up further responsibilities in family management. We mutually feel that it would do more good for us to cut on unnecessary classes and spend more time with our family now that we have a chance to be together with them.

Maybe we have both outgrown the concept of ‘best friends’ we were introduced to when we attended primary school or kindergarten. Yet, as we both strive to juggle our times to play so many different roles to so many, I think it’s safe to say that we have found in each other what in the old days we would call our ‘best friend’.

1st entry posted from the new home

The good news is – I have internet connection at my new home now. The previous entry was actually posted from a friend's house. Borrowed a friend’s bike and rode all the way to Urayasu (Gyotoku’s neighboring city, 2 train stations away) this afternoon to buy wireless LAN card. I wasn’t sure whether or not there was any available wireless network connection at my home, but I bought the card anyway, hoping there would be one. Alhamdulillah, one of my neighbours is using YahooBB wireless internet network, so basically I’m ‘menumpang’ for free. (typical Melayu kan – kalau boleh dapat free, nak aje)

The not-so-good news is – I went to Shibuya Police Station yesterday to check for an update on my lost wallet, and no, it hasn’t been found. I was told by the Malaysian Embassy that I needed a copy of the police report for the purpose of reissuing my MyKad and Malaysian driving licence when I go back to Malaysia, but since I went to the police station after 5 p.m., I have to return some other day before 5 p.m. in order to get a copy of the police report.

More not-so-good news – beginning April, Mambusho (along with JICA and even JPA) will reduce graduate students’ monthly stipend to 172,000 yen. A monthly decrease of 3000 yen compared to what we are receiving now. If you are wondering how much that is – in Tokyo, one can buy a dozen uncooked 900gm Halal roaster chicken with 3,000 yen. 12 uncooked whole chicken.

Other good news though – I found out that I put the receipt for the 60,000 yen reikin (key money) in the tenancy agreement file, meaning I could submit a claim for it from the Malaysian Embassy, which I did when I went to Shibuya yesterday. I found out that I had to pay 63,000 yen for chukai tesuryo (agent's fees) after all, and they could also be reimbursed by the Malaysian government, alhamdulillah.

And I didn’t had much trouble when I asked for reissuance of a Gaijin (Alien Registration) card at the Ichikawa City office yesterday morning. I felt relieved about not having to go to Meguro to do it all over again. Despite my limited Nihongo, alhamdulillah, I no longer have to rely on other people’s help in dealing with the officer at the Foreign Registration desk (as well as National Health Insurance). The officer took a look at my passport, made some call to the Meguro Ward Office where my first Gaijin card was issued, printed a few things, asked me to check on some information, and after a while issued the notice asking me to come and collect my card in 3-4 weeks time. (I can write my own address in kanji now – a vast improvement compared to when I had to ask a Malaysian undergraduate to assist me with writing my address in kanji during my first application of Gaijin card)

I’m pretty much settled now at my new home – and beginning to accept that my wallet might be lost for good despite hearing of other people’s success stories in getting their lost wallets returned. Yes, I’m gonna miss a lot of those stuff I had in there – especially the kad nikah and PPTD membership card (because the photos somehow looked better than most) but they are just things. Patah tumbuh, hilang berganti - whatever broken will grow back, whatever lost will be replaced. Even if replacement for my student card, for an instance, cost me 2000 yen. (worthy of 8 uncooked 900gm roaster chicken). Oh well…

No, I haven’t put up the curtain rails although I have already bought them as well as some curtains. My landlord promised to help me with putting up the curtain rails this weekend. The broken water pipe for the washing machine had been fixed, the lock for the bathroom door could not be fixed as yet (the landlord seemed very reluctant to buy a whole new door to replace it), and the TV is watchable now since I already bought the suitable antenna cable at Joshin in Urayasu this afternoon, where I got the wireless internet card.

I need to get some blankets before the rombongan Cik Kiah from Malaysia arrives – and Hien told me that I could get some used ones not far from her place. We promised to meet up in Shinjuku tomorrow. Oh, and I also promised to look up some suitable apato for Kak Tini’s friends in Gyotoku. I think I can do that since I'll be meeting the real estate agent this weekend over some issue of letting my family staying with me in the apartment. I was told by the landlord that the agreement we had was only to have me as a sole tenant, whereas I had been rather clear with the real estate agent that the reason I moved was because my family is coming and I could no longer stay at the single-tenants-only hostel where I used to live.

Anyway, it was good seeing Kak Tini, my fellow PTD who has been selected as a JICA scholar to do her Masters in International Relations at Waseda University this year. Since I was in Shibuya yesterday, I took the opportunity to visit her in JICA’s Tokyo International Centre, bringing along Beard Papa cream puff as a welcome gesture. I had some trouble finding my way from Yoyogi Uehara eki, but finally I managed to find TIC, and found her although several earlier calls went unanswered. I must admit that I’m a bit ashamed for not taking her out to dinner, (what with my limited fund and all) as it is normal for sempai to give their kohai a welcome treat. Instead, Kak Tini generously gave me a ‘buka puasa’ treat. The good thing about TIC is that they provide Halal meal, so yes, it was a welcomed change for me because instead of the normal seafood Saizeriya or Tenya stuff, I could have rice and chicken. With Indonesian sambal even.

We spent some time chatting after meal, talking about pros and cons of spending a little bit time and money to learn Nihongo, life as Waseda student, life in Tokyo and life in general. I haven’t seen her for so long, and while we have each grown and change in our own ways, we could still connect with each other. I have a feeling that it’s going to be fun to be seeing her and Fary, yet another PTD from our batch, in Waseda this coming semester, insya Allah. Ada geng la sikit.

Hmm… in less than 10 days time, insya Allah my family will be joining me here. And I haven’t even make any arrangement for their transport from Narita to here. Mak said they will bring some comforter along. It would be interesting to see if Mak choose to bring Narita comforter to Narita…

My own place

So, after gotten married and gave birth to a baby, this might be one of those monumental steps one is supposed to experience in life – moving into one’s own place.

Well, all these while I’ve been staying either at my parent’s house, my grandparent’s house, some relatives’ house or a hostel. Oh, and yes, I did squatted for a while in Leeds and in Manchester – but that was almost akin to staying in a hostel. Funny, I never thought the first time I move to a place of my own, it would be into a tiny 32.4meter² 2-room apartment in Chiba, Japan but here I am anyway.

Already I am wondering how to decorate it and what else do I need to buy. I guess I’m lucky because the apartment, being at the corner, is quite bright and installed with air-conditioner, lamps, hot water system in the kitchen and bathroom. Already, I’ve bought some essential household appliances – fridge, washing machine, microwave oven, rice cooker, electric kettle, mini vacuum cleaner and while I don’t really consider TV to be that important – I got it too. And just this evening, I also bought gas cooker (called gas table here in Japan), after two days of eating mixed rice a’la Korean drama Full House’s style (rice with leftover or in my case, instant, lauk - such as sambal bilis, serunding and some cut raw vegetables, such as carrot and cucumber – all mixed together)

All these while – I’ve never had to worry about paying my own house utilities bill or to make much contact with landlord or real estate agent regarding any house repairs and what nots. Already, I’ve to contact the real estate agent regarding some repairs that need to be done – the leaking pipe for the washing machine, the bathroom door that cannot be locked, and I need to be taught on how to connect the TV cable to the antenna outlet (it sure looks different here than in any other place I’ve been to, Tokyo included). And I’ve already been visited by the Keio Gas service representative to teach me on how to make use of gas-related utilities in my house.

The unpacking had been – blurgh. Mostly done, but it's a work in progress considering I still need to figure out how to make the most out of the one closet that we have. Bought a pipe hanger, and really hope it would help. Need to arrange everything neatly, to fit it with hubby’s and baby’s stuff later on. But I think we will do okay. It may be a little tight and compact – but we’ll do okay, insya Allah.

I’ll be working on the curtain rails tomorrow insya Allah. Is, who sold the microwave for 1500 yen (when they still cost about 3000 yen at the second hand shop) and gave a complimentary iron as well as an old TV cabinet, had promised to help me out with the curtain rails. I haven't even bought the curtain rails or the curtain but I've already got the windows measured. I still have a lot to do and buy for the house in preparation for the rombongan Cik Kiah from Malaysia, but eventually I believe everything will be just fine.

Of course it would be even better if I do get a phone call from some authority letting me know that my missing wallet – and all the important documents in it - had been found.

Yet another note

I am distressed right now - the lost wallet (and everything else that came with the territory), entering a new house alone, getting to know new Japanese neighbours after a bad start of moving in at 10 p.m., no internet connection at the house as yet, preparing for Masters entrance exam, hearing about my colleagues in Malaysia moaning about yet another price hike for petrol, hearing about some of colleagues from my batch hitting M48 post when I'm still stuck at M41, and I could go on and on and on.

But hey you know what - I'll be seeing Huzaifah in 16 days, insya Allah. Along with hubby, Mak, Abang (my younger brother who's keen on catching the Tokyo Anime Fair as well as a visit to Ghibli Museum) and my two aunts - Mak Ram and Mak Su.

The thought of seeing Huzaifah alone is enough to cheer me up.

I don't know when I will next get some access to Internet as well as finding time to update this blog. So, till then, take care everybody and please pray that everything will be all right whether or not the wallet is found (preferably found by a kind person who will return it to the Police with all the content intact, and I'm even willing to receive it with everything else intact but for the 12,000 yen)

Moving and Lost

This is my last entry posted from Komaba International House. I've moved my stuff to Gyotoku yesterday and I'm going to bid my farewell to everybody in a few hours.

I rented a small lorry (they refer to it as truck in Japan though) yesterday, and Atoque, a friend from Waseda agreed to drive it. Yesterday was in a way an adventure for both of us – he got a traffic summon, while I lost my purse. And, no I haven’t receive any call yet to let me know if anyone have found it. Yes, there was quite a substantial amount of money in it, but more importantly, all my IDs are there – my Alien Registration card, my Health Insurance card, my Student card plus my ATM card. Then there were my Malaysian ID too – MyKad, Driving Licence, not to mention ATM card, Marriage Registry card and even PPTD membership card.

Like I said – it was and adventure of sort. We started at about 10.20 a.m and finally returned the lorry by almost 10.20 p.m. I first thought that we only needed to use the truck for about 6 hours – it turned out we used 12 hours after all.

The day was a bit cloudy and I prayed that it wouldn’t rain because the lorry did not have any cover. We were supposed to go to Shinagawa first to pick up the sayonara sale stuff I have agreed to buy from Khurrum and Iram Kham. Khurrum, who’s working for a software company just got assigned to Dallas, so they have decided to go back to India first and sell off most of their property in Tokyo. Iram, understandably, was a bit upset since she just came in September and have been buying lots of furniture and appliances since she thought they would be settling in Tokyo for quite some time.

Anyway, it wasn’t smooth sailing to Shinagawa. Thinking that there would be a Shingawa exit point, we purposely passed the Shibuya exit and instead drove up to Kanagawa prefecture – not far from Kawasaki, and had to make u-turn, which cost extra 600 yen in toll. We went back to Shibuya and started tracing our way from there. Alhamdulillah, since the main route was only Yamate Dori, which ran along a few wards in Tokyo – it was relatively easy to find our target area.

I got a decent deal for a 560 litre 3-door fridge, a 5kg load washing machine, a mixer/blender, remote-controlled fan, a single futon, a double futon, a coffee table, some big and small drawers – all for only 20,000 yen. Iram even threw in complimentary pillow, curtains, bed sheets, pillow cases, a wall clock, coffee mugs and decorative ornament. Iram told me that she got a fight with a friend who refused to pay a decent amount for her stuff instead asking for a lot of complimentary things. At first she wanted to buy a display showcase from Iram, but when Iram refused to sell her other electrical appliance for ridiculously low price, she called the earlier made deal to buy the showcase too. That explained why Iram asked me for a 7,000 yen deposit a few days back – just as a guarantee that I won’t back off from my promise.

The truck was almost full when we were done with loading the stuff I bought from them. Then, we made our way to Shibuya, to the Vietnamese Embassy, to pick up a 25 inch Sony bilingual TV which I have agreed to buy from one of Hien’s friend. The seller originally asked for 9,000 yen, but I guess because it was quite difficult to get a buyer for a big TV, she agreed to sell it for 5,000 yen. Which is a good bargain considering that even 14 inch bilingual TV are normally sold for 9,000 yen in a second hand shop.

But before we got to Shibuya, not quite out of Shinagawa area, Atoque committed a traffic offence – we were a bit confused by the traffic light and he moved when we should not. And it just so happened that a traffic police was nearby and saw us. So he got a 9,000 yen ticket for that and a demerit of 2 points (3 points demerit in a year means retaking driving class, 6 demerit points means the driving license will be suspended). I tried to plead for a lower fine or a lower demerit point – but the officer – friendly as he was – simply did not relented from his stand. Zannen. But then again, I have noticed that’s how most people work in Japan anyway – always by the book. Not much of human factors being considered – despite our explanation that it was Ghazali’s first time offence, and we were not from the area and thus unfamiliar with it, we were only students on scholarship and do not even have part-time job and all. Yes, he was friendly – but only on the surface, I would say. Unlike his counterpart in Malaysia, who may seemed a bit garang, but they normally let first-time offender off with just a strict warning.

So, there – the first traffic summon for Atoque in Tokyo. He even asked me to take some photos to record the memory.

After picking up the TV from Vietnamese embassy, we were supposed to go to Komaba, to pick my stuff. I have been told that it should only be a ten-minutes drive from the embassy to my hostel, Unfortunately, although I have a map, I got the wrong direction, so we were unable to get to the hostel although we were already in Komaba. We tried out several routes but failed to find a way to get there. It was so frustrating that at one point I felt like giving up and just go to Chiba. It was late. We were hungry. We already missed Zohor prayer and we just couldn’t find a way to get to the hostel.

I first referred to a map with direction which I got from a security guard from my hostel. Since he doesn’t drive, it was not surprising that he gave us the wrong direction. Then, I remembered that I have another map, with direction given by an officer. Suddenly, it made more sense, and yes, we finally got it.

Prayed, had our lunch/dinner combi meal (I prepared nasi goreng in the morning before I left for Gyotoku), prayed Maghrib and started loading my stuff on the lorry. Atoque got some help from John, my Filipino friend from Waseda. Somehow, they managed to cram everything in the already almost full truck with my additional luggage bags and boxes, alhamdulillah. My compliments went to Atoque, who was the mastermind in stacking everything and securing them using the futon as a cover and then some rope to keep everything tight and unmoving.

We left Shibuya at around 6.00 p.m – the time I thought everything would be over and done with initially. We asked for some advice on how to get to the nearest highway entry point and we did so within a few minutes after leaving Komaba. It was then when I first realized that I didn’t have my wallet with me. Thinking I might have left it on my study desk in the hostel, I just asked Atoque to loan me some money for toll, petrol and additional fees for truck rental. I thought we were okay – we already were on the highway, somehow Chiba wasn’t all that far anymore.

But things didn’t always go as we planned. Atoque took a wrong turn, and hence we had another bout of being lost in Tokyo. Normally it takes about 1 hour or so to drive from Shibuya to Gyotoku. But two hours after we left Komaba, we were still in Tokyo. It was almost as if we were sightseeing tourist – a drive along Shinjuku, Yoyogi, Harajuku, Shibuya (found another entry point to the highway – but it was closed), Roppongi, Otemachi, Ginza, Kyobashi, Nihombashi, Kanda, Akihabara and Ueno. We both complained about (and maybe even cursed) the bad signage for Highway entry points in Tokyo. It was really bad – the signage is not at all helpful like it is in Malaysia. No telling where we could find the entry point, not giving us any idea where one route really lead to - and made worse by the fact that we were not equipped by GPS navigator system. I won’t even start to compare the signage found in Japan with the signage in UK (which is far better than in Malaysia – one could rarely get lost driving in UK thanks to effective and efficient signage). I tried calling some friends for help on direction – but I could not get any of them on line. Finally, we stopped at the Police station in Ueno, and I went to ask for direction from the officer in charge.

I must say that knowing a little nihongo comes in handy in such situation. Although the officer in charge tried to explain things in English, it made more sense to me when he explained things in Nihongo. He was very helpful – providing me with copies of several maps – Ueno, the Highway map, and Ichikawa map (where Gyotoku is located). Still, due to the bad signage we fumbled for a while before we got it.

Called up Pokcik to get some help with the unloading. It had been a long day for Atoque and we were both glad to know that Pokcik manage to get 3 other guys agreeing to assist with the unloading. We arranged to meet in front of a 100 yen shop, but upon arriving there, we realized that it wouldn’t be possible for us to park there due to some repair works being carried out.

Thus, I waited near the area. I even walked around the vicinity a few times, just to make sure that they were not waiting nearby, but to no avail. About 20 minutes later when I was chilled to the bone, I saw Pokcik coming, and only then we made our way to my new house.

I felt guilty about moving at 10.00 p.m. – when my new neighbours were probably already on bed, but it wasn’t like I planned to do so. Anyway – the gentlemen did everything rather efficiently and by the time I came back from returning the truck with Atoque – they were almost done. I thanked them and I promised to one of them that I’ll try to have a makan-makan session in the near future (as a thank you gesture, a common practice around here when one receives such assistance). After everything was unloaded, I then returned to my hostel.

I seldom sleep in the train, preferring instead to read, a habit many Japanese have. But last night I was so tired that I dozed off during more than half the journey home. But I got all alert and awake when return and realizing that my purse was not on my table – or in may bag, or in my drawer, or in my coat’s pocket, or in my pant’s pocket – I just could not find it.

I called the rent-a-car, asked them to check in the lorry. No, nothing there. Called Atoque’s house, just in case he remembered me putting it somewhere, but he wasn’t home yet. His wife, Kak Ida, consoled me though – and that helped a little bit. I guess I just needed someone to tell me everything will be all right.

So, instead of sleeping well on the last night where I have the luxury of a bed – I slept fitfully – thinking about a lot of things that could go wrong if my purse is not found. The Alien registration card in itself is pretty tricky since I’m moving to Gyotoku and is supposed to just get my new address written at the back of my card rather than making a new card. Then there’s the ATM card that had to be stopped. Then there’s the 60,000 yen receipt for reikin from my house owner which I’m supposed to submit to the Malaysian Embassy for a refund. Not to mention the 12,000 yen I had inside the wallet. But I was more worried about all the ID and the ATM card than the money itself.

I already have my ATM card stopped. But there’s still a lot of things to be done… I just hope and pray and wish that my wallet had been found by someone nice and kind enough to send it to the Police or to the hostel. I had a strong feeling that I might had dropped it somewhere in Komaba, when were trying to ask for direction from some passerby.

Well, so this is my last entry posted from Komaba International House.

Good old friend...

I first came to Tokyo in 2002, attending a 2-weeks course organized by KDDI Engineering and Consulting (KEC). That was when I first fell in love with Japan. Prior to that, I never harbored any interest to further my study here.

Anyway, back then, I was the only Malaysian participant in that course and one of the youngest in the class. Out of the 17 or so participants, I was rather close to two – Khamla from Laos and Odgerel from Mongolia. Since I was the only female in class and a foreigner with almost no knowledge of Nihongo apart from saying greetings, either Odgerel or Khamla or both would always accompany me wherever I went to. They would do such things as carrying heavy bags for me, securing a seat for me when we traveled by train and basically acted like my bodyguard of some sort wherever else we went to.

Odgerel, Khamla and I, Akihabara, 2002

I have kept in touch with both of them – we have kept tabs on each other every now and then. Khamla had visited Malaysia twice since our first meeting and I had visited him and his family in Vientiane once in 2004. While I’ve yet to visit Ulaanbaatar, I’ve kept in touch with Odgerel via email and instant messenger. He won a scholarship by World Bank to do his Masters in Yokohama in 2003, brought his family to Japan six months later and just went back to Mongolia in April 2005.

Khamla and I, Laos Presidential Palace, Vientiane, 2004

He got promoted upon his return to Ulaanbaatar, and this year, he was asked to give a presentation in Shinjuku on Mongolia ICT development. Since Shinjuku is not that far from Waseda, we agreed to meet a day after he arrived in Japan.

Odgerel and I, Tenya, Takadanobaba, 2006

We had dinner together at Tenya – which he insisted on paying and reminded me of the old good time when he was acting as my bodyguard of some sort. It was good to see him again and I got to see latest photos of his son, his wife (who he claimed to be better in Nihongo than he is because she picked up on Nihongo while working part-time while he was too lazy to take any Nihongo class) and some snapshots of Ulaanbaatar.

It would be great if we could have a reunion of some sort – Khamla, Odgerel and I – in Japan. Sometimes, it just felt good to meet up and do some catching up with friends, despite not knowing each other all that well. We just clicked with each other – and the friendship has lasted all these years although we seldom talk or email each other. Yet, whenever we meet, it doesn’t feel awkward, as if we have just last met about a few weeks ago, instead of years ago.

Meeting Odgerel again somehow made me miss a few old male friends, who had been kind to and left lots of pleasant memories for me. There’s Sidan, who’s currently being assigned in Prague. There’s Syah, who’s somewhere in the Middle East. And there’s Fadzli, who I’ve lost touch with since 2000.

The truth is, I’ve tried to track him down via Google, but to no avail. In fact, I posted my wedding invitation card to his old address (his mother’s house). I even wrote hubby’s address (because we used different cards for my family’s and hubby’s receptions) just to give him a choice whether to attend the one held in Seremban. I did not see him though.
Fadzli was the one who introduced Jeffrey Archer to me in 1990. Since then we had discussed and traded lots of books with each other. In fact he once called me all the way from Newark, Delaware, just to let me know that he was reading the then newly released “The Fourth Estate”. When I saw “False Impression”, the latest book by Jeffrey Archer, I immediately thought of Fadzli, wondering whether he has gotten hold of this book, whether he still read a lot now, whether or not he has children to whom he can read to, how is he faring right now and so on and so forth.

Well, in case anybody knows a particular Ahmad Fadzli Sharip, who graduated from Delaware University, alumnus of Sekolah Tunku Ampuan Durah (SPM batch 1992), married in 1999, used to live in Taman Paroi Jaya and then moved to Melaka (and I don’t know where else) – will you please let him know that he's being missed by an old friend?

10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1... Tagged!

Tagged by Zyrin. Again.

I know this was supposed to be done in 5 minutes, to make it a spontaneous thing… but being old forgetful me, I stumbled here and there, thus it took me more than 5 minutes

10 FIRSTS
first best friend: alamak – can’t remember. Probably Ajim, when I was 5 or 6 years old, but he was more like my Paksu’s best friend. Or Ismarita Ismar, Std 4.
first item you stole: some money from arwah Tok Ayah’s pocket to buy Chickedees at kedai Makji Nah next door
first pet: again, can’t remember. But most cherished would be Bulat and her litter – Cumi, Ciki, Comel and Comot. (Mak had even named some of our cats Baghdad, Najaf, Tikrit…)
first piercing: never had any
first school: Tadika Kemas, Kampung Syed Syeh, Kelang Lama, Kulim, Kedah
first house location: Kg Syed Syeh, Kulim, Kedah
first crush: Standard 6 – on someone who is now working in CIMB, married with one kid
first kiss: Yeah, I have to go with the common one on this - by my parents on the day I was born ;-)
first car: Green Kancil, WHC 6341 (which now is an orange sporty Daihatsu Mira look-alike driven by my sister-in-law-to-be)

9 LASTS
last time you smoked: never. Amaran oleh Kerajaan Malaysia: Merokok Membahayakan Kesihatan
last food you ate: Strawberries
last movie you watched on dvd at home: Madagascar
last movie you watched at the cinema: Star Wars II (because Celcom gave me free pass for its preview. I don’t normally go to cinema)
last text message: (c-mail actually, which is more common in Japan) to Hien, asking her to remind her friend to e-mail me details of a 29 inch Sony Bilingual TV she’s interested to sell for 9,000 yen
last music video u saw: ‘Wish’ by Arashi
last song you listened to: ‘Mr Traveling Man’ by Tokio
last words you said: “Oyasumi nasai” to Kylie as we departed from the lounge, right after Desperate Housewives was over

8 HAVE-YOU-EVERS
dated a best friend: Nay, don’t think so, unless people consider my ex to be my best friend
been arrested: Not yet so far.
been on TV: Briefly on Malaysian TV news and briefly on Japan TV, as part of Kawaguchi sensei’s class when he was featured in one documentary
eaten sushi: Sure! I love sushi!
cheated on your BF/GF: Not that I remember.
been on a blind date: Nay
been out of the country: Yes, as a student, as well as on job assignments
been in love: Yes, and hope to remain being so...

7 THINGS YOU ARE WEARING
1. Earth coloured sweater
2. Long johns
3. Contact lenses
4. Wedding ring
5. Engagement ring
6. Headphone-and-mic
7. Vaseline on my chapped lips

6 THINGS YOU HAVE DONE TODAY
1. attended International Negotiation class
2. acted as HR manager in an "unhappy at work" negotiation scenario
3. fasted
4. bought Nelson DeMille’s The Gold Coast for 100 yen at a used bookshop
5. closed a deal with someone who’s leaving Japan to buy her household appliances for 17,000 yen
6. watched Desperate Housewives

5 FAVORITE THINGS
1. Huzaifah’s baby smell
2. ice cream (just tried the new Haagen Dazs Cheesecake ice cream yesterday – yummy!)
3. falling leaves in autumn
4. all shades of blue
5. Syawarma kebab in front of the smaller Kamdar at Jalan TAR

4 PEOPLE YOU TRUST THE MOST
1. Mak
2. Hubby
3. Mak Tam
4. Masni

3 THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE
1. Performing Hajj/Umrah with hubby
2. Paragliding or hand gliding or parachuting at least once
3. Clearing all debts

2 CHOICES
vanilla or chocolate: chocolate
rock or rap: err… pop?

1 PERSON YOU WANT TO SEE RIGHT NOW?
Huzaifah

Okay, and I hereby pass this tag on to:
Jaja lagi
Ahkak lagi
Kakaq lagi
Dakwanie (yang dah lama tak berbelog)
Dr Boring (come on doc - this is not so bad whattt...)

Komaba International Student House – a personal review.

I found my answer to Lomo’s questions regarding my current dormitory, Komaba International Student House to be rather lengthy that I decided to post a whole entry on it.

The Jasso's introduction to the dormitory could be found here. I don't know much about any other dormitory except that they are often a lot more expensive than what I have to pay ;-)

Travel from Komaba to Waseda daigaku is about 50 -60 minutes, door to door. This includes a short walk from the dorm to Komabatodaimae eki, boarding a Keio Inokashira train to Shibuya, a short walk to JR eki in Shibuya, boarding a JR Yamanote train to Takadanobaba and a 20 minutes walk to Waseda daigaku.

What do I think of Komaba International House? If you have been following this blog long enough (or care enough to dig the archive) I think it’s quite obvious that I am quite fond of this place. It’s convenient.

It’s just 2 eki away from Shibuya, and not that far from Shinjuku. It’s a lot more convenient to be placed in Komaba than Soshigaya, the other Jasso dormitory. If you are lucky like me, you won’t get the room next to the railtrack (which I find very noisy), but even then, friends have told me that after a while they get used to the sound of trains passing by

The fee is just about 35,000 yen monthly with 24/7 internet connection. Utilities fees are paid depending on one’s own consumption. I normally pay only 4000 – 5000 yen for water/electric/gas combined.

The room is cozy for single occupancy. Own toilet & bathroom, with bed (bed is almost a luxury in Tokyo), air-cond/heater, reliable internet connection, fridge and spacious closet and racks. Laundry for pillow cases, bed sheets and blanket covers are provided about 3 times a month.

While it’s not permitted to let others stay overnight, it’s okay to entertain friends. There are plenty of common rooms with TV (one at every fllor in Building 2), large spacious kitchen with dining area and for quiet moments – there’s a large study hall and private meeting rooms that can also be used as study room.

There are a lot of activities for residents – Nihongo class, Go (Japanese chess) class, Karate, Aikido, Taekwondo, futsal on Sundays. Then, there are activities jointly organized with KIND, Komaba International Friendship Club, such as mochitsuki, cultural day, tea party, bazaar, free service for mending clothes. And there’s a koen nearby, in case one needs to unwind and take a walk during the weekend or after a long tiring day.

It's easy to make new friends from all over the world here, most of them Mambusho students too. (Just the other week, I was exchanging notes with a Korean friend and a Chinese friend about Korean dramas, conversing in a mix of English and Nihongo. I also met an Israeli for the first time here in Komaba) There are Japanese Resident Assistants to seek out for little assistance, and the dormitory even provides monthly professional counsellors's service.

The staff are friendly and understanding too. I didn’t pay my room fees until about a month after my arrival because of lack of funding and they were okay with that. And everything was catered for upon arrival – a Jasso officer waiting at the airport, free transportation to the dorm, smiling staff waiting for me to enter the nice room and rest right after arrival.

Would I recommend it to any other Mambusho student?
Absolutely.

8ight Points of A Not-So-Perfect Lover

Tagged by Zyrin. So here goes nothing.

A. 8 Different Points of a Not-So-Perfect Lover*
(and alhamdulillah I found him in my hubby ;-) )
* since according to DrB, we are only human kan...

1. Pious practising Muslim. Maybe this has something to do with my upbringing and being a former student of a religious school – but yes, previously I’d always fallen for guys who could be considered ‘ustaz ala-ala’. I ended up marrying a real ustaz though. Talk about dreams come true

2. Offers me a lot of love and affection… to borrow Robbie Williams’ lyric. And not shy to be open about it. Unlike my Ayah who once scolded Mak for kissing his cheeks at the airport when she bid farewell before she went overseas, hubby has no qualms about PDA. He kisses my forehead or cheek in public all the time. We both enjoy holding hands and sometimes, he even hugged me in public. Yes, if not for Huzaifah, some people might have mistaken us for being unmarried dating couple.

3. Biggest critic yet strongest supporter. He has to be able to tell me where I went astray and guide me to the right path. Criticism is not necessarily a bad thing – we all need to be reminded from time to time of our own weaknesses. On the other hand, I also need him to respect, understand and support me – which so far he’s been doing rather well, alhamdulillah.

4. Intelligent, inspiring and all other universal qualities of leadership, making it easy for me to look up to him as my numero uno hero.

5. Shares a lot in common and enjoys our differences. Too similar is duh, dull. Total opposites on the other hand could be lethal. So, we should have enough in common to enjoy each other and enough differences to learn from each other. And yes, like many, I agree that it is vital for couples to share common goals in life.

6. He makes me smile. Yes, even if he sometimes has to resort to goofy lame jokes - the bottom line is - he makes me smile. He lighten things up when I need lightening up. He makes my day with his compliments and praises. Some days, he makes me smile just by grinning at me via the webcam.

7. He gets along well with most people. "Boleh dibawa ke tepi ke tengah", or that was how my friend Sue used to describe it. He knows how to carry himself well - be it when dealing with superiors or subordinates, friends or foes.

8. Attractive. Like Rin, I (used to) have a weakness for tall guys. Maybe because I am often considered tall for a Malay girl and just to prove to my Tok that it’s not impossible after all finding a taller Malay ‘gu’ (partner) for me. So yes, I love the fact that not only is my hubby taller than me, but he is also so very huggable – with his broad shoulders, cute butts and all. In short – he’s yummy and he’s mine, heheheh…

B. Sex of Target
100% male. Tulen bang, tulen.

C. Tag 8 Victims
1. Jaja (bulan kene tag semanjang, heheheh)
2. Ahkak
3. Kakaq
4. Dr B
5. Marinadelrey
6. Fatihah
7. Sabah
8. Keng

Some nice treats

Nice vanilla pudding bought in Shibuya by Tomomi-san, a nihonjin volunteer who joined my Nihongo Ichi classmates and I during our small party on Saturday evening. The taste and texture of the pudding is almost akin to the vanilla custard filling of Beard Papa's cream puffs.


Nasi goreng and mango pudding in pineapple syrup with pineapple slices, my contribution for the party

The first bunch of flowers received in Tokyo, from Tomomi-san - as a token for being the hostess of the party. The first flower I received since the last bouquet Juz gave me for my graduation in 1998. I didn't receive any during DPA graduation in 2002, and despite some hints, hubby has yet to give me even a single stem of flower.


My first lavish meal at a 5 star hotel in Tokyo (thanks to the generous Pak Ginandjar)

Sometimes things just don't work out the way we want them to be

Sometimes things just don’t work out the way we want them to be
Sometimes the unforeseen could happen.
And when it happens, earlier plans sometimes need adjustments.
Some changes are inevitable.

I am supposed to make a deal with a sempai, buying his things upon his return to Malaysia. I haven’t been buying much household appliances and furniture since I arrived because most essentials are provided at the hostel – the room is equipped with a bed (with pillow and blankets – with almost weekly laundry service for the pillow cases, bed sheets and blanket covers), a study desk, a fridge, a closet with my own bathroom and toilet. I can watch television at the common room and there’s a common use kitchen, so there’s no need to buy any gas cooker. There’s a coin laundry which is quite cheap for Tokyo standard (150 yen for 4kg of load, 100 yen for 30 minutes dryer cycle). So, yes, initially there was no need for me to buy much household appliances and furniture.

Nevertheless since my family will be joining me to stay here insya Allah in March, I have to move out because the hostel only allows single occupancy. No one is supposed to stay overnight apart from the registered residents.

Finding a new apartment in itself was an adventure. At first I thought of just moving in the same apartment my sempai is staying once he moves out. However, I started having second thoughts when I heard that the person staying at the apartment below him could not tolerate noises and had been knocking on his neighbour’s door all the time because she thought the neighbour was too noisy. According to the neighbour though, it wasn’t like he was having wild parties all the time, the elderly obaasan downstairs could not even tolerate some music from the radio meant for one person’s entertainment. I could not imagine her tolerance for baby’s cries at night and I certainly do not want to be subject to being hit by a broom like a blogger had almost been subjected to, merely because the neighbour claimed that her footsteps were noisy.

Then I became further discouraged as I discovered how freezing cold the house could be during winter and there was no toilet bowl, merely squatting toilet with tiled floor which could make a winter morning trip to the toilet a horrendous experience. Not to mention that the fudo-san (real estate agent) was quite fussy. I’d only met her once, but even a quick deal with her was rather unpleasant compared to dealing with my current helpful and attentive fudo-san.

Searching for an apartment within my relatively low budget of 60,000 yen a month was no easy feat. I went to several real estate offices and on few occasions when I thought I had found suitable ones, I had always been told that the oya-san (house owner) preferred not to have foreign students as their tenants.

And then one day about a month ago, I found a suitable one – a mansion, not an apato, which charges suitable rent. (Apato refers to apartments built of wood or prefabricated. Mansion, on the other hand, refers to condominium made from brick, not a huge manor.) I liked it almost instantly – it was snowing and yet the house was not all that cold upon entry. I asked for a new air conditioner-cum-heater to be installed, as well as a water heater at the sink since I don’t want to do my dish washing with freezing cold water. The fudo-san told me the next day that yes, the oya-san had no objection to a foreign resident being his tenant and he also agreed to install a new air-cond as well as the hot water for the kitchen sink.

In Japan it’s customary to pay a lump sum of money before taking up residence. There’s the reikin (key money), the shikikin (deposit) and chukai tesuryo (real estate agent’s fee). It is common to pay un-refundable reikin equaling 1 or 2 months of rent, just as it is common to pay shikikin (refundable but often not refunded due to funding repairs of the premise once a tenant moves out) equaling 1 or 2 months rent. So yes, it could take a lot to pay upon entering a house. Considering it’s common for one to pay about 6 months worth of rent for fees, I guess I’m lucky having to only about 3 1/3 months worth of rent upon entrance - one month of reikin, one month of shikikin, one month rent on advance, no chukai tesuryo and 9 days rent as my tetsukekin (booking money).

But apparently luck does not follow me when it comes to buying household furnishes and appliances.

Like I said earlier, I was supposed to be buying a sempai’s old furniture and appliances – fridge, hot carpet, cabinet, sofa bed, study desk, etc. I asked around and people had given me estimate figures of all the things he offered to sell to be around 20,000 to 23,000 yen. He however wanted to sell for 30,000 yen. First we agreed to meet halfway at 25,000yen, but he increased it to 27,000 yen, saying the extra was for the bicycle. I was a bit reluctant, knowing that I was paying more than I was supposed to, but because I thought I could still afford it, I agreed to it.

I had wanted to move the things on this coming Friday, the 24th, but because I have a class scheduled to end at 4.10 p.m. that day, I won’t be able to sign the agreement with the oya-san that day. The oya-san have asked me to sign the agreement on Sunday, the 26th. Nevertheless since the sempai is due to attend a seminar elsewhere on Sunday, I tried to get the oya-san’s permission for me to move my sempai things to my new apartment on Saturday, despite not signing any agreement as yet then. After a few discussions mediated by the fudo-san over the phone, the oya-san finally agreed to let me store my things at the apartment even before signing any agreement.

I had made arrangements to rent a small lorry to be driven by Is, a helpful friend who is also very fluent in nihongo since he’s been staying here first as an undergraduate student and now as a working adult for a total of almost 8 years.

And then, the unforeseen happened.

My husband told me excitedly last Friday that there’ll be a rombongan cik kiah to visit me in Tokyo. Instead of having just him, my baby and my Mak, I’m also to prepare for my younger brother and two aunts, Mak Ram and Mak Su, coming. That sounded great, of course.

But it also means that I have to re-assess my budget. And a change in plan.

And so I told the sempai that I was having second thoughts about buying everything. Previously he had told me that he had other prospective buyer if I did not want to buy his things, so I asked him to detail out the price for each stuff, so that I can select and choose what I really wanted and let him sell the rest to someone else. I could no longer afford paying 27,000 yen for everything, so I thought of re-prioritizing, buying essential stuff first, perhaps up to 20,000 yen and postpone buying other things until later.

I certainly did not expect a harsh reply.

Instead of calmly and transparently letting me know the estimate price for each item, what I got instead was a reprimand, being told off for not keeping true to promises made, labeled as someone who “menyusahkan orang” and he even said that he would rather give away all his stuff for free than dealing with someone like me. It’s a matter of his pride, or so he said.

I was stunned.

I thought about what he said – tried not to be hurt by the harsh words he used – and when I failed to get him on the phone, I wrote an email, stated my request once again in a more rational argument. Reminded him, how initially I never made a big fuss when we came to a price more to his liking than mine because I did not think that I would have a budget constraint. Told him how sincere I’d been all along, since I’d already made the arrangement to get the house key even before I sign any agreement, and how I’ve arranged for a lorry to transfer the stuff. In fact, I even told him that if he wanted to sell the things I might decide I do not need, I wouldn’t mind sending that stuff to the second hand shop available in the vicinity.

So, I asked him to reconsider, to find a solution that’s workable and a win-win situation for both of us. We both know that he won’t be getting as much if he choose to sell his things to the second-hand shop, and I have to pay more to buy brand new stuff. I was hoping that he would agree to meet me halfway

No, he was adamant. Either I take all or nothing. If I don’t want to take them, he wouldn’t mind taking all those things back home to Malaysia or even giving them away free to others.

I was flabbergasted.

So, just like every other time I found difficulty in making up my mind, I consulted my husband.

After explaining everything to him, I asked him whether or not I should take the offer and pay 27,000 yen for things some friends said are not worth that much anyway.

Hubby’s answer was short and simple – “Tak payah”

“But we have to pay a lot more to buy brand new stuff,” I told hubby.

“I would rather we pay more for brand new stuff and cut our expenses elsewhere than dealing with someone who could not show any compassion”

And thus, I conveyed the message to the sempai through instant messenger, dreading more awful statements. He took it well enough though, saying that he just wanted confirmation whether or not I wanted to go on with the deal earlier decided. I said no, the deal was off. I said sorry a few times though as I could not help feeling awful about how things ended. Yes, the way he hurled words like “tak pegang janji”, “menyusahkan orang” and how he said that he would rather give things away for free, and would rather bring things back to Malaysia (where of course, there is no use for such things as heater and hot carpet) rather than dealing with me – hurt. Still, I wished things could end up differently.

But then again, sometimes things just don’t workout the way we want them to be
Sometimes the unforeseen could happen.
And when it happens, earlier plans sometimes need adjustments.
Some changes are inevitable.
But some people are just too obstinately fixed with their own so-called ‘principle’, making it difficult as well for others to make adjustments.

Diari minggu ini

Khamis – 8.00 mlm. Makan di kedai tabehoudai (all-you-can-eat) di Shimokitazawa. Kena bawa CD Hana Yori Dango (lagu Wish tu boleh tahan kawaii), buku Digital Fortress (Faizly nak pinjam) dengan buku American Gods (nak pulangkan kat Apid)

Jumaat – 12.00 tghari. Makan tengahari di RIHGA Royal Hotel. Tak pernah lagi makan kat hotel sejak datang Tokyo ni. Visiting Professor, Pak Ginandjar nak belanja semua student (yang rajin sangat ambil Winter course masa orang lain tengah seronok cuti). Pak Ginandjar ni pun bukan calang-calang orangnya – Pengerusi Dewan Perwakilan Daerah, Republik Indonesia (ala-ala Speaker Dewan Negara la) dan pernah jadi Menteri pun.

Sabtu – 10.00 pagi. Ada tea ceremony sempena Ume Matsuri di Koen selang 4 eki dari asrama. Sensei yang ajar nihongo di asrama yang jemput. Nak pergi ke tak ke, tak pasti lagi. Bunyi macam menarik jugak. Hmm...
5.00 atau 6.00 ptg. Kawan-kawan perempuan Nihongo Ichi nak datang. Makan-makan. Sembang-sembang. Dah lama tak jumpa. Kelas dah habis tiga minggu sudah. Rindu jugak.

Ahad – Puasa lah kot. Asyik-asyik makan je keje. Macam takde bende lain.

5 Months and 5 Days

That was how old Huzaifah turned yesterday, alhamdulillah.

My boy had a taste of the first picnic by the seaside on Sunday when my parents and hubby took him to PD. Hubby reported that our son loved playing in the sea, but somehow seem scared of the pool. Mak said it was probably because the pool seemed deeper. Anyway, I hope Huzaifah will grow to enjoy water because I intend to teach him how to swim from a young age. Both hubby and I cannot swim, so we don't want our baby missing on one of the essential skills in life (apart from being able to drive and use a weapon. I know I still need a lot of practise before I can be a good shooter, but at least I know how to use a gun or an M16)

He was already asleep when hubby called me last night, which was rather disappointing because I'd been calling all evening, missing him and wanted to take a look at him. I don't get to see him everyday, but it seems obvious that my boy is resembling his father more and more with each passing day - but everybody tells me that he got his big expressive eyes from me. (Yeah, I know they are not that big or expressive now - but that was how they used to be when I was Huzaifah's age - or so I'd been told.)

Alhamdulillah, he woke up at 10.00 p.m., so I got to see him after all. It's kind of funny playing peek-a-boo via the webcam, but somehow he always responds better when he can see me. If he just hear my voice on the headphone (we used PC-to-PC call), he normally seems stunned, sometimes furrowing his brow as if it really puzzled him. If he sees me, normally he will smile and make happy babbling sound too as I play peek-a-boo with him and talk to him.

Mak said that he insisted on being held even more now. Mak suspects it's probably because rolling around and ceiling watching - his main activities everytime he's put down - could be dull after a while. He's also good at picking up hints when someone is going out. Everytime he sees either Mak, Ayah or hubby wearing nice clothes before they go out, he would raise his arms, almost begging to be picked up. He now has preference too over who he wants to pick him up, but has yet to show any sign of separation anxiety with those he's familiar with. I really hope that he won't develop that until later on, when he's with me here in Japan. When the time comes for Huzaifah to be able to show anxiety and upset at the prospect of being separated from someone, I hope that someone would be either me or hubby. It's heartbreaking enough to think that I've only been spending time together with him for about a month out of his five...

Still, he makes me happy. It makes me happy just to think about him and his antics, and happier everytime I get to see him. Not as happy as being with him of course, but I try to make the most of what little I have now.

If I don't, then I might run a serious risk of letting go of my sanity.

Preparing for the PTD Examination?

I’m not sure whether my fellow PTD bloggers like Kit, Dakwanie or Zyrin get asked all sorts of questions just before a PTD examination or PTD assessment is due to be held. But boy, I sure get a lot of questions – from friends who are asking on behalf of themselves, their friends or families or from total strangers. I have shared some tips in preparing for PTD Assessment before and I think they are still relevant.

As for PTD examination, I can’t say that I know much – after all it’s been quite a while since I sat for my exam 6 years ago. Nevertheless, as yet another ‘public service’ of some sort, here’s what little I can share:

There are 5 papers - on General knowledge, IQ, Administration, Comprehension and Essay (betul ke ni? tak ingat lah…) - all to be taken within one day

* For the general knowledge paper, try to get some background reading on Malaysia and the administration of Malaysia. ‘Malaysia Kita’ published by Intan or any STPM level Pengetahuan Am book normally helps one to get basic understanding on this and that.

* Reading the newspapers and magazines such as Newsweek, Time or Slate (online) might help clueing in on the current issues. Try to remember some details of important world events and who's who of the world organizations. (In 2000, we were asked who won the World Cup 1998 and who was the Sec-Gen for OIC)

* For the IQ paper - skip the difficult ones and get the easier ones done first because normally there's not enough time to finish all the questions. In fact – so far I’ve yet to meet anyone who managed to finish all the questions. (We suspect that it’s probably one of the ways for people at JPA/SPA to test how the examinees manage their time under stress).

* Administration paper is to be done according to common sense.

* Brushing up on writing skills in both English and Bahasa might be a way to help with scoring the essay paper. Normally an examinee can choose one out of 3 topics - one on economical issue, one on political issue and another on social issue.

To those who have decided to sit for the exam, don't fret too much – contrary to the rumours that claimed them to be very difficult, they are actually not all that bad. Trust me, some had even passed the exam without much preparation. (But then again, many have passed the exam without making it to the service because they either flunked the assessment and the interviews. Oh well...).

All the best.

What V Day?

When I went out last Friday, I noticed huge crowds at chocolate shops everywhere. And these crowds were made up of mostly women. It took me a while to realize that these women were busy shopping for Valentine’s Day.

In Japan, it’s customary for women to give men gifts of chocolate. Apart from buying honmei (prospective winner) choco for their love interests, women usually buy giri (obligatory) choco for their male colleagues and superiors as token of appreciation. So yes, I saw women with large bags, perhaps containing 20 or 30 boxes of chocolate emerging from chocolate shops, like E-Royce in Shibuya Tokyu departmental store. And I suspect that it’s a time for chocolate producers like Meiji, Lotte and Glico to be gleefully happy with all the increase in their sales.

Since modern obligated Japanese males would like to reciprocate their female colleagues’ thoughtfulness without being seen as sissies who buy chocolates during Valentine’s Day, they wait until a month later, to return the favour on March 14th, popularly known as the “White Day”. The same custom of men giving women gifts of white chocolate or candies in white box are also practiced in South Korea and Taiwan.

I smiled to myself as I looked at girls of all ages standing in queues and staring at the fascinating display of all kind of chocolates (the Japanese are well-known for their skills in arranging stuff to make them really attractive), thinking how lucky I am as I am not obliged to spend my money needlessly on all those chocolates.

After all, like many Muslims around the world, I have never celebrated Valentine’s Day for religious reasons. Those who claim that there’s nothing wrong for Muslims to cherish their loved ones on this particular day perhaps should do some background reading on the origin of this day. (Ask Yahoo could be a good place to start.) Besides, I also believe that those who sincerely love another do not need just one day in the whole year to remind their loved ones of their heartfelt love. They should be free to express their love at all times, on all occasions.

As far as I am concerned, the only significance of February 14th is that it happens to be my friend Saliah’s birthday. And this year, as always, I wish her lots of joy, laughter, happiness and blessings.